A very legitimate guide to help you lock in like never before this school year
Illustration by Luisa Dela Cruz.
To scroll or not to scroll?
To start off the school year, I decided to do everyone a service (or disservice), and provide a list of techniques to help you lock in like you never have before.
Ice it out
Not as in buying another $70 blinged-out CASETiFY phone case — I mean actual ice.
Let me explain step-by-step. Pay attention so you don’t get confused.
- Grab a medium-sized container (like the Tupperware your mom bought for your school lunches that you never use).
- Put your phone in it, turn on the tap, and fill up the container with water.
- Pop it in the freezer and wait for the water to solidify. While you wait, guess what you can do? Study!
- After 2 to 4 hours, gently take the ice block out of the container. Carefully place the iced phone on a surface you can see.
Until your phone is melted out of the ice, the only path forward is homework.
Positive reinforcement
Set aside dedicated study hours every day. During this time, give your phone to your roommate. Make sure they will refuse to give it back, even if you beg and plead — warning: you might have to pay for your roommate’s therapy. If you don’t have a roommate, give your phone to a friend. If you don’t have friends, ship it to your parents’ house. You get the point.
Simultaneously, for one entire week, deprive yourself of the things you love most.
I usually choose ice cream, mochas, and oat fudge bars. But the options are unlimited!
Whilst you deprive yourself and get someone to hide your phone, do your schoolwork.
Your short-term reward is getting your phone at the end of your study hours, while your long-term reward is having the things you love back in your life at the end of the week.
This system reinforces your good behaviour — doing your schoolwork. Hopefully one day you won’t need a reward system and can just do your work!
Replacement strategy
Sometimes the only way we get through studying is the promise of a scrolling break midway through.
Here’s your reminder of the countless other things you could do instead that will leave you feeling productive, not half-dead.
Do you have a pet? Perhaps a cat? Perhaps a cat that poops a lot? Well, then I am assuming you have a litter box. Go clean that.
When was the last time you paid your credit card bill? Maybe you should get on that. And if you don’t have money to pay off the bill, then perhaps a job is in order. Yes, you are capable of getting a job during the time it would take to break out of your scrolling trance.
How about some push-ups? Get those muscles pumping for some more typing.
And there you have it folks! Your very own guide to avoiding your phone this school year. The next time your phone is staring at you while you’re trying to study, you’ll know exactly what to do. Please use this guide wisely and at your own discretion.
